Not Motivated

I am in a funky place today... Just one of those days when I get annoyed with this whole process and just want it to be done. Tired of thinking about it. Tired of thinking about what to eat, tired of having to cook for everyone... Tired Tired Tired...


Hey everyone... come on in the waters fine (pity pool)




Once again, I had a fill on 10-5-09, my third and again I am back to being able to eat more then I am supposed to. I really don't understand how in 17 days I go from border line not being able to drink fluids to back to eating what I want... The only thing that is different for fill three that I didn't have in fill one and two is bread causes me a little problem but I can feel it get ready to maybe not go down and then I feel it pop through the band (actually feel movement) and it goes through. But other then that everything is going right down... I am also tired of the roller coaster of fill, drop 8 pounds in 4 days go back up 5 pounds over the next 5 days and back down to a total of 9 pounds lost in 17 days. I know that sounds great but I can tell that it's going to go back up again because I am able to eat more and not happy and that will make me start searching for something to munch on...


I had my surgery on 6-18 -09... When I went in for my presurgery appointment exactly on week prior I was 355. When they weighted me the day of surgery I was 345... Today I am 317.

Now if you ask my surgeon, I have lost 38 pounds in 4 months... because they go by the pre op weight a week before... Well I go by the weight the morning of surgery so it's only been 28 pounds in 4 months... I know I'm splitting hairs, but for all that we go through I want more then 7 pounds a month...


I also don't really feel like I know what to eat. I don't remember ever being told a specific calorie count... I am just supposed to eat 60 grams of protein... I am supposed to shoot for just 1/2 a cup of food at each meal.


Man do I sound like a ungrateful whiner writing this. Maybe I just needed to whine to some people that may know what I am feeling...


I have to confess also, that I love lapbandtalk.com but don't sometimes the same questions over and over drive you crazy! And people need to lighten up... I hate when someone confesses to eating a cup cake you have people chime in and say you should call your surgeon immediately you probably made your band slip and your going to explode in 30 seconds... Jeezzzz lighten up its a fricken cup cake.


Oh and I'm tire of my hair falling out. That is sexy.


I loved the one post that said WHOPPER JR... the girl was ready to jump off a bridge... She ate a whopper jr, two cake things, chips and salsa and I think a bag of pizza rolls in 2 hours... I was so jealous! I want a hamburger... I just thought she was cute being so real... I'm surprised the bandster patrol didn't advise her to have the band removed immediately because she was no longer worthy.


Sorry for being a bitch... BUT MAN I FEEL BETTER! I will finish this last Mai Tai I am enjoying while in my pity pool and be great...



Thanks ladies for listening! You guys are the best!